Monday, September 30th, 2002
Dear Diary,
Weather over cast and warm today, with the scent of bacon wafting from the east.
Master Eric took me to the Dog Park where I played with Molly this morning. She is a lhasa apso & the prettiest girl-pup I have ever seen! She loves to chase and roll with me in the sand. When we wrestle I like to nip at her ears & she makes the most adorable squeaking sound! O how I adore her!
There's a west highland terrier named Iyla, that we sometimes see at the Bluffs, and I adore her too. Sometimes I think I love her even more than Molly.
And another westy named Cloe used to cuddle with me on the couch in Doggy Day Care! Can it be, I love her too? I thought we schnauzers were meant to be loyal. Perhaps, I simply have an unbridled capacity to love!
What's that old saying? When I can't be near the girl-pup I love, I love the girl-pup I'm near.
Sometimes when I am playing by myself, I like to imagine that I am out in the wild, the leader of my own pack, and Cleo & Molly & Iyla are my faithful wives. Archy & Bob are sometimes there too, but they have wives of their own so, I don't have to share. My wives & I, in my happy Land of Daydream, frolic in tall grasses & chew stick & dig holes. At night, we hunt the Enemy Rat, like my Great Great Grandsire, the Peerless Kid Moody, who slew the Mad Mouse of Munster! & tore the head from the Rancid Rat King of Rutters Hall! As my joyful fantasy draws to a close, I imagine my tired limbs curled in furry repose with my Molly, my Cloe, & my Iyla, & my wives & I drift off into blissful slumber.
On the other hand, I can't shake the daunting feeling that I am missing something- something intangible. Surely, a young boy-pup like myself, ought to be doing something with pretty girl-pups besides playing dig & chase. My male friends & I do that. With a pretty lassie, shouldn't there be something more- more- more, I don't know! It plagues me like a half remembered scent. I'm vaguely aware that, when I was younger, I felt a yearning something like the one I imagine I should feel now. But since the Scary White Coat Man, took those little Round Things I Used to Lick from between my legs, the feeling has not returned. How can that be? Did the Round Things have a purpose other than to be licked? I'm sure my Master Eric knows the answer to this, because he seemed very distressed the day the White Coat Man took them away. If Master Eric ever learns to speak dog, I will ask him.
I don't think he'll ever speak dog though. I have lived with Master Eric & Mistress Wendy for nearly six months, & not once have they peed on a lamp post. Do humans not feel a need to communicate with each other?
Yes, six months I've served my wonderful, all-knowing, all-caring owners. Six months. I eat big kibble now, mixed with my little kibble. I saw Mistress Wendy coo at a tiny puppy the other day, & my heart felt a little envious, pang. I am a child no more. In less than three months I will be one year old, yet I feel like I'm seven! Am I growing old before my time?
O Perfidious Time, blunt thou your awesome claws!
That's all. Time to chase squirrels.
-Schubert